Choosing Who To Marry

I used to think there was only one specific person God wanted you to marry. But after reading this, I’ve come to a different conclusion:

“A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.” (I Corinthians 7:39)

The Apostle Paul says here that a woman has the freedom to marry whom she wishes, as long as they are a fellow Christ-follower. This kinda nullifies the whole “soul-mate” idea we’re spoon-fed via Hollywood.

However, I certainly believe there are people God does not want us to marry. The first being someone who does not follow/know/love Him.
But there are times where someone can say they believe in Jesus, but they’re not really following Him wholeheartedly. It is certainly detrimental to your own pursuit of Christ to bind yourself in marriage or even just tie your soul to someone relationally who does not give their whole heart to God.
Think about it: if this person cannot give Love Himself, the One who’s given them everything; died for them, made the way to heaven for them–if they cannot love Him with all their heart, or trust Him with all their heart, how could they possibly love you in a trustworthy and fully devoted way? They can’t devote themselves to the Perfect Person, how will they devote themselves to an imperfect person? The obvious answer is they won’t. Even if they never physically commit adultery, their eyes will look at others, their minds will wander, they will fantasize, or they’ll be more devoted to something else like a job, the kids, or themselves; their dreams, their desires, their money, their space etc.

The kind of love Christ taught us was very, very counter-nature:

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. (Philippians 2:3, 4)

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. (I Corinthians 13:5-8)

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her … So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself … let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:22, 25, 28, 33)

Submit to your husband in everything (Ephesians 5:24)? Respect a man always, even if you do not deem him respectable? This is something a natural woman, a woman who does not love and trust Jesus wholeheartedly will not want to do, nor can do.

Love your wife as you love your own self? That means to always look out for her and provide for her needs, cherishing her always, treating her as one who is just as important as your own self so she needs to be listened to and appreciated. This is impossible for a man to do till death do you part.
And to not seek your own? That’s all the culture feeds us: do you feel good with them, do they make you happy, are you pleased with them in bed, do you have a good time with them? It’s all about you. But Christ says: wait until you marry this person to enjoy their body. Sacrifice your interests, don’t seek your own, be patient “suffer long.”
When things get tough, don’t give up, do not fail to keep your vows, bear all things, always believe the best. I mean, this stuff is hard at times even for Christians to do because it’s much easier to put yourself first. But when you love Christ with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, you seek to please Him. You desire to obey the way He tells you to love others. And in His amazing grace, He gifts you with His Holy Spirit so you actually can supernaturally love the way He commands. It’s an incredibly beautiful thing.

So Christian, can you marry who you want? Only if they too love the Lord. You’ll save yourself much heartache and save yourself from divorce if you marry someone who loves Jesus more than anything or anyone else. So please be wise. Do not marry based on feelings. Marry based on observation. Does this person really love Christ wholeheartedly? How do they show it? What things come out of their mouths? What do they want to do for the Lord? How is God using them presently? Do they walk in the 1 Corinthians 13 kind of love toward others? Are they patient, kind, honest, pure, a servant? Or are they selfish and self-seeking, a gossip, rude, impatient, and prideful?

Besides choosing to follow Jesus, who you marry is most certainly the most important decision you will ever make. Who you marry will either build you up in Christ, or drag you farther away from Him. There is no in-between. You decide who to marry. I pray it’s a good choice.

Have any thoughts on this post, comments or questions? Please feel free to share them in the comment section. I’d love to hear from you

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Please don’t pray to saints

There are some who most times simply out of ignorance, place “the” saints on a level where they are able to answer prayers. But to you loved ones, I share one of many verses where Apostle Paul calls anyone who has trusted in Christ a saint:

“To the church of God that is in Corinth, to those sanctified in Christ Jesus, called to be saints together with all those who in every place call upon the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, both their Lord and ours: Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.” (1 Corinthians 1:2, 3)

All who trust in Jesus are called saints, but when I die, please don’t pray to me. Absolutely nowhere in Scripture does any believer ever pray to anyone except God Himself. The only thing saints who have died and gone to be with The Lord do is watch what we’re doing and possibly cheer us on. I get this notion from Hebrews:

“And what more shall I say? For time would fail me to tell of Gideon, Barak, Samson, Jephthah, of David and Samuel and the prophets— who through faith conquered kingdoms, enforced justice, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, were made strong out of weakness, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight. Women received back their dead by resurrection. Some were tortured, refusing to accept release, so that they might rise again to a better life. Others suffered mocking and flogging, and even chains and imprisonment. They were stoned, they were sawn in two, they were killed with the sword. They went about in skins of sheep and goats, destitute, afflicted, mistreated— of whom the world was not worthy— wandering about in deserts and mountains, and in dens and caves of the earth. And all these, though commended through their faith, did not receive what was promised, since God had provided something better for us, that apart from us they should not be made perfect.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” (Hebrews 11:32-12:1-2)

Please note how the writer says, “looking to Jesus.” We are never advised in Scripture to look toward angels or deceased saints. In fact, the Apostle Paul who was one of, if not the most impacting saint to ever walk the earth wrote to the Corinthians:

“I appeal to you, dear brothers and sisters, by the authority of our Lord Jesus Christ, to live in harmony with each other. Let there be no divisions in the church. Rather, be of one mind, united in thought and purpose. For some members of Chloe’s household have told me about your quarrels, my dear brothers and sisters. Some of you are saying, “I am a follower of Paul.” Others are saying, “I follow Apollos,” or “I follow Peter, ” or “I follow only Christ.” Has Christ been divided into factions? Was I, Paul, crucified for you? Were any of you baptized in the name of Paul? Of course not! I thank God that I did not baptize any of you except Crispus and Gaius, for now no one can say they were baptized in my name. (Oh yes, I also baptized the household of Stephanas, but I don’t remember baptizing anyone else.) For Christ didn’t send me to baptize, but to preach the Good News—and not with clever speech, for fear that the cross of Christ would lose its power.”(1 Corinthians 1:10-17)

“I came to you in weakness—timid and trembling. And my message and my preaching were very plain. Rather than using clever and persuasive speeches, I relied only on the power of the Holy Spirit. I did this so you would trust not in human wisdom but in the power of God.”(1 Corinthians 2:3-5)

“Dear brothers and sisters, when I was with you I couldn’t talk to you as I would to spiritual people. I had to talk as though you belonged to this world or as though you were infants in the Christian life. I had to feed you with milk, not with solid food, because you weren’t ready for anything stronger. And you still aren’t ready, for you are still controlled by your sinful nature. You are jealous of one another and quarrel with each other. Doesn’t that prove you are controlled by your sinful nature? Aren’t you living like people of the world? When one of you says, “I am a follower of Paul,” and another says, “I follow Apollos,” aren’t you acting just like people of the world? After all, who is Apollos? Who is Paul? We are only God’s servants through whom you believed the Good News. Each of us did the work the Lord gave us. I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow. It’s not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow. The one who plants and the one who waters work together with the same purpose. And both will be rewarded for their own hard work. For we are both God’s workers. And you are God’s field. You are God’s building … Stop deceiving yourselves. If you think you are wise by this world’s standards, you need to become a fool to be truly wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolishness to God. As the Scriptures say, “He traps the wise in the snare of their own cleverness.” And again, “The Lord knows the thoughts of the wise; he knows they are worthless.” So don’t boast about following a particular human leader. For everything belongs to you— whether Paul or Apollos or Peter, or the world, or life and death, or the present and the future. Everything belongs to you, and you belong to Christ, and Christ belongs to God. (1 Corinthians 3:1-9, 18-23)

So, beloved, please do not exalt any of the saints who have passed to a place where you now make requests of them and trust them to work on your behalf. Christ died to remove the veil.
At the time Christ walked the earth, the Jewish Temple was where the Jews offered sacrifices and performed worship according to the law of Moses. In this temple there was one place called the sanctuary and a second place behind a veil or curtain called the Holiest of All–the earthly dwelling place of God’s presence. Only the High Priest, once a year, was able to enter the Holiest of All to offer sin sacrifices for himself and the people, signifying the people were separated from God because of sin, but the moment Christ died on the cross, the Bible tells us:

“And Jesus cried out again with a loud voice, and yielded up His spirit. Then, behold, the veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom; and the earth quaked, and the rocks were split …” (Matthew 27:50, 51)

When Christ died, He paved the way for us to enter God’s presence through trusting in His sacrifice, trusting He is the Perfect Son of God who died and rose again for that very purpose, as the book of Hebrews affirms:

“This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary. Jesus has already gone in there for us. He has become our eternal High Priest in the order of Melchizedek.”(Hebrews 6:19, 20)

We do not need to request anyone for anything, because of our Precious Savior, our Perfect High Priest, we can go right into God’s Holy Presence to speak to Him and make requests:

“And so, dear brothers and sisters, we can boldly enter heaven’s Most Holy Place because of the blood of Jesus. By his death, Jesus opened a new and life-giving way through the curtain into the Most Holy Place. And since we have a great High Priest who rules over God’s house, let us go right into the presence of God with sincere hearts fully trusting him. For our guilty consciences have been sprinkled with Christ’s blood to make us clean, and our bodies have been washed with pure water.”(Hebrews 10:19-22 NLT)

Superhero movies affirm God’s Existence

Did you want to see The Dark Knight, The Avengers, or Superman? Lets admit, these superhero movies are quite popular. But why? My answer: they prod at the very fibers of our being because deep down, we all yearn for a Savior.

Superhero movies affirm that there’s a God. So many of us go spend our twelve to twenty dollars (or more if you’re with family), to see a distinct hero save the world.

Now please consider this: What religion besides Biblical Christianity is themed around the salvation of the world? One man who comes to earth as a Hero, a Savior to the world for all who accept Him as that and turn from their sins? We humans care so much about the idea of world-saving because just as we naturally agree with the Ten Commandments–lying, envy, theft, murder etc. is wrong–because they’re written on our hearts, so this grandiose concept of saving the world is etched on our hearts, placed there by the Creator of the world.
Even the whole good guy versus bad guy thing. We can’t wait to see the bad guy go down and rejoice with the victory of the hero because this is indeed what will happen at the end of God’s story: Jesus leads an army and with the mere breath of His mouth destroys Satan.
If we’re just the product of evolution–animals that can somehow think, judge, have opinions, and feel love and compassion toward others–why do we care if the good guy or bad guy wins? Who cares if the immoral one wins, survival of the fittest right? If he has the power to destroy all weaker animals (humans) under him, why would we get angry? He is just the ultimate display of a completely evolved animal, getting rid of the weaker links and conquering territory.
But we do care. We do want Darth Vadar [Star Wars], Bain [The Dark Knight Rises] and Red Skull [Captain America] to go down. And this is because we are truly made in the image of a Good and Just God who sent a Hero to save the world and makes sure this Good Guy and everyone who’s with Him wins in the end.

Ladies, Ain’t No Man Want You As Bad As This Man Does

Jesus died for you.

“See, we are going up to Jerusalem. And the Son of Man will be delivered over to the chief priests and scribes, and they will condemn Him to death and deliver Him over to the Gentiles to be mocked and flogged and crucified, and He will be raised on the third day.”-Matthew 20:18-19

 

I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.” -Jonh 10:11

 

For this reason the Father loves me, because I lay down my life that I may take it up again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord.” -John 10:17-18

Now I don’t about you ladies, but no guy has ever died for me.

Jesus wants to live in you and share a mutual love relationship with you always. 

As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love.”-John 15:9-10

 

“In that day you will know that I am in My Father, you are in Me, and I am in you.  The one who has My commands and keeps them is the one who loves Me. And the one who loves Me will be loved by My Father. I also will love him and will reveal Myself to him.”-John 14:20-21

 

Jesus answered, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word. My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our home with him.” -John 14:23

 

“I desire those You have given Me
to be with Me where I am.
Then they will see My glory,
which You have given Me
because You loved Me before the world’s foundation.
 Righteous Father!
The world has not known You.
However, I have known You,
and these have known that You sent Me.
I made Your name known to them
and will make it known,
so the love You have loved Me with
may be in them and I may be in them.” -John 17:24-26

 

Jesus wants to give you true and everlasting joy.

 “I have spoken these things to you so that My joy may be in you and your joy may be complete.” -John 15:11

 

 

Jesus wants to protect you.

“I am no longer in the world,
but they are in the world,
and I am coming to You.
Holy Father,
protect them by Your name
that You have given Me,
so that they may be one as We are one.
While I was with them,
I was protecting them by Your name
that You have given Me.
I guarded them and not one of them is lost,
except the son of destruction,
so that the Scripture may be fulfilled.” -John 17:11-12

 

Jesus wants to give you eternal life.

I give them eternal life, and they will never perish—ever! No one will snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all. No one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand.” -John 10:28-29

 

Jesus wants to give you peace.

I have told you these things so that in Me you may have peace. You will have suffering in this world. Be courageous! I have conquered the world.” -John 16:33

 

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” -Matthew 11:28-29

 

These are all things Jesus temporarily left heaven to give you. Think about this ladies, He didn’t just come from a far away place, from a distant land–Jesus came all the way from heaven to seek and pursue you and carry you home!

“For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.” -Luke 19:10

 

“For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will but the will of him who sent me.” -John 6:38

 

That’s how much Jesus loves you. He left the most incredible place in existence, where there is no pain, suffering, or death to do just that–suffer and die! Jesus knew His fate, but He–while we were yet ignoring Him, mocking Him, hating Him–chose to come anyway and suffer and die for us all, knowing that was the only way any of us could enter heaven.

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” -John 14:6

 

He was and is the only person to ever walk this earth in complete perfection and holiness before God. He is the only One who has never ever lied, or lusted, or taken something that didn’t belong to Him, or disobey His Father. The only One who never broke any of the commandments. Jesus is the only person worthy of heaven and that is why He had to die, to make those who would trust in His righteousness (not on themselves) be able to get to heaven. Let’s face it, God is perfect, and none of us are. That’s why He had to have His perfect Son come down from heaven and rescue us from eternal separation from Him. 

It amazes me that while I was chasing after guys, searching for “the one”, giving my whole heart to my boyfriends, and only praying in Jesus name for stuff I wanted, not ever reading His book and trying to get to know Him, He still was pursuing me and chasing after me. He was still calling my name, and desiring me; loving me, even though I didn’t really love Him. Do you know there were actually times where I cried out to Jesus, asked Him to hold me while I cried, and then immediately my crying calmed and stopped completely, and I walked away with a smile on my face–yet totally forgot about it right after and then kept on chasing after guys? I was so desperate for love, I hadn’t realized until I had my last and final heart break that love was there all along, waiting for me to embrace Him. I wish I had realized sooner, but Jesus is faithful, and He restored all the time I missed out on His love. It’s been five years since I started pursuing Jesus, getting to know Him and love Him, and our relationship just keeps getting better and better. 

I remember with my last ex before Jonathan, how our love had reached a peak, and then it just went downhill from there. But with God the Father, and His Son Jesus, there is no end to their love. It just gets stronger and stronger as you continue to discover who they are and what they think about you, and what plans they have for you. Everything Jesus said He wanted to give us, and came to give us, I have and do experience daily. His love, His presence, His protection, His joy, His peace, the strength He offers to keep going, and the assurance of heaven. This is why I am so in love with my Father God, and His wonderful Son, Jesus. His love has radically transformed my life and the lives of so many I know. His inspired word along with the very words He spoke have never failed me and continue to prove true. Jesus said, 

“Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will by no means pass away.” -Matthew 24:35

 

and, 

“If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” -John 8:31-32

 

I pray you find what I have come to find. That no man will ever want you as much as Jesus wants you, and no man will ever be able to give you, all that Jesus can give you.

Know your worth, know that you are loved,

 

Natasha